I work in shifts, four days on and four days off, as a firefighter. This gives me a huge advantage in terms of the time I have with my daughter.
We attended playdates together and shared crafts and toys — and despite online portrayals of a more equal world, I’m usually the only dad in attendance.
Maybe that’s why, when my daughter started school, I felt like I was suffering from a mild form of empty nest syndrome. I wanted to nurture our relationship, so I decided to plan a trip – just for the two of us.
We are English, so I thought it best to stay in Europe, despite having traveled to Japan twice with my wife and daughter. (A long flight without her mother was a terrifying concept, I admit).
I checked flights, my budget and travel times to keep her sleeping schedule intact, narrowing it down to two places: Porto, Portugal or Bergen, Norway. I then asked my daughter if she wanted to go somewhere warm or cold. To my surprise, she chose the cold, so it was Bergen.
A natural icebreaker
We left for Manchester airport much earlier than we should have, which ended up giving us more time to spy and talk to people in the terminal. My child’s confidence and cuteness acted as an ice breaker and we interacted with many more people than I would have if I was traveling alone.
Landing in Bergen, Norway, after traveling from Manchester.
Source: Thomas Board
I tactically booked a hotel at the airport to cut the lead on our first night in Bergen. But we both arrived full of energy. When the lights went out, she fell asleep almost instantly, while I lay awake. Now I was an excited child, delighted with our journey ahead.
My daughter exudes a confidence that I hope she never loses.
The next day we took the train to the city center — and I already knew that Norway was the right choice. The tunnels and stunning topography are matched only by humans.
My daughter exudes a confidence that I hope she never loses. She gave “thumbs up” signs to the locals on the platforms at every station, always getting a return gesture and a smile. She quickly switched to a two-handed love heart sign, which the young Norwegian couple copied back. After enough real hearts had been successfully melted, she returned to the coloring book the hotel doorman had given her that morning.
‘Children come first’ in Norway
From the efficiency of the train to the cleanliness of the city streets, Norway reminded me of Japan.
The similarities to the “Land of the Rising Sun” continued throughout our trip: funny beeps at intersections, prevalence of 7-Eleven stores, reserved but friendly people, subtle and mature fashion choices, excellent customer service, delicious food, and unreserved kindness to children.
“My desire to nurture our relationship and rekindle my past love of solo travel led me to explore traveling just the two of us,” said Thomas Board.
Source: Thomas Board
“Children come first in Norwegian culture,” a mother told me at VilVite, a children’s science museum in Bergen. We talked about how impressive the museum is for children, how the employees at every corner wanted to improve the children’s learning experience. Opened 17 years ago, the museum looked brand new. The exhibits change regularly, so local parents keep coming back.
As we talked, my daughter was playing with the other kids, building Lego cars to test on a wavy wooden track that ended up smashing them to pieces.
The VilVite Science Center receives around 120,000 guests a year.
Source: Thomas Board
Raising children in Norway is different from raising children in England. There is a monthly cap on childcare costs, which encourages both parents to work and promotes gender equality in the workforce. Children do not start school until they are six years old, which gives them more time in the family community. The country’s low crime rate means it’s normal for children to walk alone to school or to the homes of other family members — another similarity to Japan.
Loose plans guided our journey and I let my child guide us as much as possible. We ate pancakes in the port, laughed at the loud horns of nearby cruise ships. We rode the cable car to the top of Mt Fløyen, hiked to the lake and skated on the rocks along the water’s edge. Along the way we saw cairns, small piles of stones that usually mark an important place. My daughter insisted on building her own, in honor of one of her favorite stuffed animals.
On top of the Fløyen mountain, one of the seven mountains that surround the city of Bergen.
Source: Thomas Board
We spent the rest of our short break exploring the cobbled streets and alleyways of the safe and quiet city, often photographing the eclectic street art. Our journey took us to a toy store, parks, a candy store, a fire station and a large church with a choir inside.
A moment to remember
During our last night together, we sat on the hotel bed, me with a reindeer hotdog and my daughter with a box of leftover pizza. She watched children’s shows on television, not caring that she did not understand a word.
It was an unplanned and simple moment and I will cherish this memory forever. We were both satisfied and fulfilled after a day of father-daughter adventure with no responsibilities or thinking about the future.
Exploring the art scattered around Bergen, including this bronze statue known as “The Homeless Man”.
Source: Thomas Board
No matter how spontaneous you are, parenthood inevitably throws you into a routine. Even “fun” can involve unwritten stipulations, worries, and planning.
That’s why alone time to truly enjoy our children is key — time when we forget about work, housework, bills, and everything else that can burden life. Exploring new territory, solving problems and having fun as a duo, miles away from home, is one of the best experiences I’ve had as a parent.
I wonder if my four year old will remember this trip when she grows up.
I know I will. I’m already planning our next trip.
