BBC World Service
Kalki Koechlin starred at Bollywood Films Blockbuster, modeled on international beauty brands and appeared on the cover of Vogue India. But in a world that puts it so premium on looking young, she says she sometimes feels “ugly.”
“We live in social [media] A world that has distorted beauty, “Actor, writer and producer talks about the award -winning Podcast BBC World Service Podcast dear daughter.” It cheated us in thinking that beauty is a certain size, a certain color or a particular shape. “
The half -hour program contains letters from their children – in which they transmit hours and life lessons that are important to them – and talk to the host of Namulants of Kombo.
Kalki’s letter was addressed to her five -year -old daughter. In it, it offers tips to move the pressure around the body image and describes ways in which unrealistic beauty standards have personally influenced.
The actor, who lives in Goi in India with her husband of Israeli musician, guy Hershberg and their daughter, says that her inspiration for a letter arrived when her baby, the day after school, came to say that she did not feel beautiful.
“When they are so young, they are so perfect and think,” Oh my God. How is it possible that you might think you are not beautiful?! “”, She says on the podcast.
In the letter, Kalki, who hosts the other BBC Podcasta, my Indian life, writes that she sometimes feels “ugly, even though the world around me is constantly telling me to be beautiful.”
He advises his daughter that “will change” standards of beauty during your life, so that you do not hold too much value for what society is currently considering beautiful. “
“Remember that your scars, wrinkles, eyes, lips, hands, feet, hair, skin all here as witnesses to your beautiful life. They are here to grow old with you and carry you through the ups and downs. They are your friends for life,” she writes.
Born at Puducherry, India, French parents, he describes himself as “Geeky Introvert” as he grows up. As a teenage girl, she says, she was uncomfortable with her appearance, and her camera career just stepped up those feelings.
“Become a celebrity, have a face outside and be in front of the camera … There is another layer of self -awareness that drives.”
Working in the film industry, she says she has experienced a special pressure to maintain your youthful appearance. Once, he says, the producer even suggested for lunch to get a dermal filler for his wrinkles.
“He said,” All you need is a little filled for your laughter lines. “I smiled and said,” Well, it better stop smiling so much. “So I think my approach was to deal with him with humor.”
Kalki says this happened when she was in the 30s and that “she had already lived enough life to not be affected.”
“But I know that to the 20-year-olds, they feel the pressure to go and change their face very early.”
Kalki says he believes that pressure is worse for the increase in social media. “We all watched each other carefully [ourselves] And we all have these filters. “And in her letter she shares her fears to try to protect her daughter from such supervision.
She joked that she even wondered about moving to Australia when she heard about the plans of the country to ban smartphones for under the age of 16. “So my mother-motion does! “
Calki is not the only celebrity who speaks of pressure to appear to the young who are facing women in public.
Stranger Things Actor Millie Bobby Brown made titles Earlier this month because of calling journalists who criticized the way he was old.
“The fact that adult writers spend their time dissecting my face, my body, my choice is disturbing,” the 21-year-old said in a three-minute video on her Instagram page.
Dear daughter Podcast is a child of Namulant Kombo, a Mother from Nairobi in search of the creation of a “manual for life” for his daughter, through the advice of parents from all over the world.
Each episode reads a letter that they wrote to their children or their future children or children they never had, with advice, life lessons and personal stories they want to convey.
In one of the episodes of the current season, Bridgerton actor, neighbor Andoh tells his three children to trust their instincts. In the second, the presenter of the Documentary Film Rae Wynn-Grant offers advice on how to survive doubts and encounters with bears.
Kalki’s letter
Dear daughter,
The day after school you told me, “Maman I’m not beautiful.” You only had four. I panicked and immediately answered with, “What do you mean, of course you are beautiful, you are beautiful like a butterfly, light like the sun.” “And you continued to say angrily, ‘I’m not, I’m just not. “
Retrospectively I wish I had listened to you and I was curious enough to ask you why you don’t feel nice? You see that I am mistaken, my own insecurity and the need to protect you, and I have not allowed you to feel the space what you feel. Don’t let others decide who you are. Neither do I. You have far more experience that you are from anyone else. And no one else can be better than you.
Fortunately, I get other chances of being a better mother, and when you said a few weeks later, “I don’t like myself,” I stopped my impulse to tell you what you were and listened to. There was some silence and then you opened up that you were hard to do with another kid at school.
I was thinking about ensuring that you know that beauty is not deep skin. The truth is that you will sometimes feel ugly. Sometimes I feel ugly even though the world around me constantly tells me that I am beautiful. And so now I made sense to tell you how beautiful you are, not when you feel bad about the way you look, not when you are dressed best, but when you are the best version of you.
As you become older, I know that you will not always believe that you are beautiful because we live in a social world that has distorted beauty, which has deceived us in thinking that beauty is a certain size, a certain color or a particular shape. These beauty standards will change throughout your life, so that you do not hold too much value for what society is currently considering beautiful.
Keep in mind that you are complete and that if you start separating your little nose or hairy eyebrow or not exactly your ears, you will start to feel ugly, but it is just because you forget the whole. The elephant is a beautiful animal, but separate it and has a long wrinkled nose, strange side you look at your eyes, a huge ears stab and a large thick stomach.
Keep in mind that your scars, wrinkles, eyes, lips, hands, feet, hair, hair, your skin all here as witnesses to your beautiful life, they are here to grow old with you and carry you through ups and downs, they are your friends for life.
Dear daughter, do you know when I will stop loving you? Never.
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