A few months ago, my friend lost her phone. The next day, another friend lost his wallet. These things were not just wrong; They did not appear on the surface the next day. They did not slide out of their pocket and down between the sofa pillows just to find them as they were decorating the house. The phone and wallet disappeared and did not return. They looked good and truly lost.
We are constantly misleading things. “The keys, the phone, my wallet,” I repeat as a mantra before leaving the house, office, bar, patting my pockets to make sure we are intact. We all experienced that “Oh, no, where is mine …” feeling. We are sure we have lost some important object and that we are affected by such an intense sense of collapse, that it is almost breath. Then, equally fast, that excellent washing of relief when you discover that your phone is, in fact, in your coat pocket – a fake alarm, a prevented crisis. For a moment you are a changed person, a person who saw the horror you have to call DMV, and you got a last-minute return. From now on, you will better monitor your things. You never want to feel that way again.
Wrong setting things up and then discover that they are everyday nonsense. The loss of things is less frequent. The fact that two good friends lost important things back, seemed strange, like a certain kind of bad luck, in my social circle. Someone once advised me that when things seem strange or confusing or too symbolic heavy, we can ask ourselves: “How would I interpret it that it was a dream?” It puts it a little distance between us and what is happening. What if I dreamed of which people in my life were constantly losing their things? How would I interpret that?
“Lose something every day. Accept Fluster / from the keys of lost doors, the clock poorly spent. / The art of loss is not difficult to overcome, “Elizabeth Bishop wrote in” One Art. “The song begins with a discussion of losing unquestioning things like keys, then goes on to greater losses:” Three Beloved Houses “,” Two Rivers, Continent “,” Even loses you. “Little losses prepare you for the big ones.
In a dream where my friends are constantly losing seemingly insignificant things, I see symbols. The wallet and telephone are boring basic things, an unsaid, indisputable tools for life we take for granted until we lose them. Then their import comes in a bright focus: what was my wallet? License, credit cards, so many receipts. Is there a gift card I will never come back? The things were so simple and I didn’t even know it. Now there is all that confusion, all this hassle. Why are we so careless? Why do we take everything for granted?
In my interpretation, I tempted to see a lesson to hold on to things firmer, maintaining a better trace, gentler. But when I asked my friend who lost her phone about experience, she described two hours of panic. The next morning, however, the feeling disappeared. “I decided that if someone wanted to get in touch with me, I could wait. To be able to get everywhere I needed, that I actually had everything I needed,” she said.
Oh! Of course! Nent! I always forget. Buddhist writer Jack Kornfield wrote about his teacher holding a tea glassSaying, “For me, this cup is already broken. Since I know his fate, I can fully enjoy it here and now. And when it disappears, it’s gone.” The cup is already broken. The phone and wallet are already lost. We have everything we need. The things we are afraid to lose are already gone.
Knowing that it does not prevent the terror from being placed every time I think I left my phone in the taxi. But in quiet moments when I’m calmer, I try to meditate on the things I hold too tightly, to let go of my grip a little, to carry a little bitterly teapot, wallet or phone, people and places and ideas that tighten, as if the tightening would prevent them from disappearing.
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